U14mm1102 Musa Umar Ibrahim
Marrying a lady older than 25 is like buying a newspaper at night” this statement might seem stupid or funny at the first read as not many can get the meaning. It means that marrying a lady that has lost some of her values as some information in a newspaper is no longer valuable at night.
That statement and many others are the reasons our girls of nowadays go to any extent to get married. Marriage to women in this generation is seen as a do die affair because of how their parents and other married friends make them feel.
Parents in nigeria raise their female children to become good wives to their husband instead of being good doctors, engineers etc. As if that not enough, they start putting pressure on that child once she is 20 asking questions like: where is your boyfriend?, when are you bringing him home? Do you know our neighbor’s daughter just got married? You are not getting any younger you know bring a man home soon.
It is because of these pressure ladies to go into relationship that lead to problems. It make some ladies go as far as stealing each others boyfriends or even someone else's husband, pretending to be what they are not while dating and enduring what so ever is being done to them by their partners (physical abuse,emotional abuse etc.), going to use extra terrestrial powers also known as “jazz” loaning the men large amounts of money and by the end of the day being dupe etc.
Thinking about this reminds me of the story of a 30 year old lady who happens to be the only female in a family of five children . Her mother was in love with the idea of having a son-in-law so when she turned 20 years old the pressure started coming from every corner. There is literal nothing she can do that her mother won't relate it to marry. She became frustrated and desperate in looking for a man, she looked for just any man not minding how he is as she want a ring on that finger.
When she clocked 23 years old. She met a man who was rich and handsome. They then starting after the fourth time of sleeping with him within a month of their meeting . She did “wifey” duties for him like cooking ,taking care of his house, washing his car. They had a heated argument one day because he said he wanted a sex with her friend and she refused so he beat her up for refusing to do what he wants. The lady later went to beg him though and agreed to his request when she sees he didn't contact her a week after the incident and she know she couldn’t let him slip in through her fingers as he is the only man that she has managed to keep for that long.
After the sex experience with her friend. The beatings became a daily routine, the relationship literally became that of a master and a servant. Two years later, he proposed in front of her mum who urged her to say yes. The beating continued through now it is coupled with cheating and whenever she confronts him about that, he would say stuff like “ shey it is marriage you want, I have given that to you so you so you should stop messing around and mind your business”
To keep the long story short he asked her for 2 million naira (which she had to borrow from outsiders just for him). This has become a norm to many men out there, deceiving girls here and there. So therefore the sooner society stop making a fuss about marriage putting unnecessary pressure on women to get married, the better. Also the sooner, women realize that marriage is not an achievement or award, the better because it wont give guys the opportunity to make use of the desperation to their own advantage.
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